Not The Onion @lemmy.world TheGalacticVoid @lemm.ee 4mo ago

Over 2,300 pounds of meth found hidden in celery at Georgia farmers market

www.nbcnews.com Over 2,300 pounds of meth found hidden in celery at Georgia farmers market

“It was hiding in the celery," said DEA Special Agent in Charge Robert Murphy. "Obviously, we threw away the celery. That didn’t make it to the store.”

“It was hiding in the celery," said DEA Special Agent in Charge Robert Murphy. "Obviously, we threw away the celery. That didn’t make it to the store.”

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Perfect example that vast majority of narcotics enter the country through LEGAL checkpoints and NOT via migrants crossing the border as Trump and GOP like to fear monger
- not to mention they are half as criminally violent compared to US Citizens....about 45% less violent if they are undocumented
  
  It has always been about racism. not crime. not drugs.
  
  The crime stats are heavily skewed as undocumented persons are significantly less likely to involve the police.
  
  Large groups of people are pretty predictable. The actual crime rates are probably much closer to the equivalent crime rates of the cities and neighborhoods that align to with their own economic status i.e class and poverty are the best predictors of crime rates, not citizenship, or lack thereof.
  
  This isn't an argument for, or against, any immigration policy. It's an argument against using flawed statistics.
  
  Or illegal immigrants are more likely out of their population (about 10 million) to commit a violent crime.
- They really seem to not care about anything other than the migrants.
  
  “But they will take my cookies!”
  
  And genitals.
- So the lesson is not to get rid of immigration, but of vegetables!
  
  I'd make that deal for cruciferous vegetables specifically. I'm one of the people for which they taste absolutely disgusting regardless of preparation or attempts to mask the flavor.
  
  But you can't have my peppers. Love me some spicy food.
The agency had learned about a semitrailer coming across the Mexican border, and agents tracked the drugs to the farmers market, said DEA Special Agent in Charge Robert Murphy. The drugs were found inside the truck, he said.

“This was contained in a cover load of celery,”

So unfortunately not inside the celery itself, which would of course be significantly more fun :(
- Now I'm wondering if you could get celery to soak up a drug solution since it's so watery, then extract the drugs again later
  
  Or serve as a vehicle for bioaccumulation.
  
  Mirepoix never was so amazing.
  
  I feel like that was the plot of an old Bond movie.
  
  I’m just imagining ants on a log, but the peanut butter is meth
  
  I feel like you’re trying to get me to snort my vegetables.
- Pretty crazy that imported food is finding it's way into a farmer's market in the first place. My local farmers market is pretty stringent on what is allowed and eant proof that your produce or wares were produced within 100 miles of the city.
  
  It was likely not the final selling point, just a convenient place with lots of trucks and people to blend into. May have had one guy with a stall, but it was more likely a place to split it into other shipments.
- Meth sprinkled celery would be quite a reinventing of the traditional ‘ants on a log’ recipe, anyway
- I'd like to return the headline please
Don't knock it until you've tried it. I lost 87 pounds in 2 months on the meth and celery diet. The twitching and sores are totally worth it.
Non-amp link: https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/2300-pounds-meth-found-hidden-celery-georgia-farmers-market-rcna166501
- Thanks, just changed it.
  
  No worries!
“How to get your kids to crave their vegetables.”
They didn't throw out the meth though right?
- The 1500 lb of meth? No they didn't throw that away.
  
  That seizure of 980lb of meth is surely a county record, and was promptly moved to a secure location.
First those sweets in NZ then this. Lots of screwups in the meth business!
- At least this meth isn't where a child would find it!
  
  I'm surprised it's where a Georgian would find it.
  
  https://www.ajc.com/life/health/report-43-of-georgians-are-living-with-obesity/OAWAXMOTWZEJ3G4D25QIB2UZTY/#:~:text=While obesity affects roughly one,that number is much higher.
  
  Unless the kid wanted to make a celery boat as a snack.
At that point, isn’t it more that celery was found in a shipment of meth?
ANTS! On a log!

But these will crawl all over you.
My mom just used peanut butter to stuff celery. This sounds like a horrible mother…
Everyone knows celery is a precursor. Jesse, it’s time to cook 🧑‍🍳
- Got that blue cheese dip, BIITCH
Not the onion indeed
The most intense bump on a log you've ever had.
Why is meth suddenly popping up in food everywhere?
- Meth has always beem a popular party drug, and has always entered the country in wild vectors like this. I think what has changed is the DEA is no longer cracking down on illegal marijuana imports aince half the states now have legalized growth in some capacity or another. No sense in shipping pot to Wisconsin or Indiana when every state they border has a dispenseries directly across the state line. The DEA has to show that they are doing something, so they are cracking down on meth now
- Meth is really tasty
- Please, Krusty, no jokes.
Both have negative calories?
At least the junkies are eating healthy.
I thought my tuna salad had a kick to it
Today on Tasting History we're making pervitin, the stimulant that fueled the third reich
Y'all got anymore of that celery?
What, 2200 pounds of meth!? I hope the ones behind it get caught soon!
There's always money in the ~~banana~~ celery stand.

90 comments