I see that now. Thanks.

It looks like we have a plausible mechanism and no evidence yet. I wonder who is trying to gather more evidence. My money is on nudging having nontrivial effect, but I might sleep better if I knew it didn't. Either way, people will try, and that's where we are.

In that case, we fall back to the impact. All the more reason to advise folks to resist tipping unless they actually want to---to interpret the requests for tips in unexpected places as little more than an optimistic, misguided, or even accidental attempt to nudge. It's the judgmental stories that people tell themselves that seem to tie them up in knots. Let others judge you for not tipping, because they were going to find some way to judge you, anyway.

We can practise resisting. I recommend trying.

People can choose. It is even better when they choose.

It's fairly well established that experiencing the moment does more to promote one's mental health than not.

No no no. The burden of proof is on you to show that people are actually tipping more.

I see. So I can understand your original reply as something in the neighborhood of "I don't believe that people are tipping more"? rather than a denial of Nudge theory?

Indeed, I don't have evidence. Let me withdraw any claim that people are tipping more, not only because I can't support it with data, but also because that's irrelevant to my point.

Nudge Theory is about nudging people by changing the choice of least resistance. The dark side of that is presenting people with an option to tip in a situation where they can be judged for refusing. Whether they actually tip more or not, this is literally taxing on the nervous system and is just another way of using bugs in the human brain against humans. It is presenting another resentment-stirring obstacle in their path.

In addition, and somewhat beside the point, I'd be shocked if people weren't actually tipping in those situations. Worse, and more troubling, I'd be shocked if they weren't consequently tipping less to wait staff who truly need it and were being tipped more before this trend started happening. I have no evidence, but I see a clear and plausible mechanism.

That's it.

And yet, people are presented more often with a meaningless request for tips. Sounds like Nudge to me. Plz bring evidence.

(Edited to remove superfluous irrelevant claim that might not be true, anyway. I regret the error.)

I don't tip businesses, I tip people. Some of those people own the business.

If you underpay people to rely on tips, you're just playing the game on a harder level.

This is the dark side of Nudge theory. People need to practise refusing and it will stabilize. I tip handsomely when I want to and I refuse when I don't. Sometimes I feel irrational guilt. I sit with the guilt for a while, then it's gone.

Tip when you want as much as you want and no more. Refuse to listen to anyone who tells you that this is morally wrong.

Peace.

The alternative is certain death. If I were satisfied with that outcome, I'd already be dead.

Me. I should sweat into bottles.

Women being intimate openly remains more socially acceptable than men doing it, at least presumed heterosexual men.

I have noticed a shift in the last five years and more of the (heterosexual) men in my social circles have openly hugged me more enthusiastically than they used to.

I have become more comfortable being affectionate in public in general, but that's about becoming more comfortable with myself, rather than a matter of what's assumed to be socially acceptable of the various genders. I'm definitely falling into the category of life's too short and I'll be dead sooner than I'd like to admit, so here I am, motherfuckers. Deal with it.

Declaring bankruptcy on a five-figure loan. I knew what I was getting into and I rolled snake-eyes.

I gave up on holiday gift giving for adults a long time ago. I prefer to give gifts throughout the year, as the opportunity and impulse strikes. I don't know how they feel about it, but I love it, and I probably give more this way.

Most frank code review. A+++.

We need to pay the programmers to put the problems in the code.

There is an emerging field of research that reframes addiction as a reasonable reaction to traumatic conditions. This doesn't explain all addiction, but it seems to explain a large amount of it. We are learning how complex a condition addiction can be and that makes it easier to feel compassion for these folks.

I lived for three months in Mazatlán. I get it.

I don’t know if anyone else has this problem but I have a really pacific issue.

The word you want here is "specific". 👍

I would like to add this: I'm pretty articulate in English, and even though I speak French quite well, I sometimes feel like a small child when I try to speak it with my francophone friends, which is why I shy away from that. I feel like I barely know how to express myself and, since I find that so easy in English, it frightens me to struggle so much with it.

I say all this to let you know that you're not alone and that practice is, indeed, a path to success. It might not be what you need, but it's worth trying.

Where can you practise speaking that you feel safe? Where you can expect not to be judged nor ridiculed?

This is why they never hold the Canadian championships anywhere near Saskatchewan.

Well.

Another reason.

A hopeful path towards peace for people who struggle with stress at their job.

Genuine answer: one mind and one heart at a time. With any luck, some of them become influential and the message spreads more rapidly.

Religious indoctrination is hard, because so many of them teach that indoctrinating others is a way to save them. Ultimately, however, the whole belief system is a house of cards. It takes surprisingly little to bring it down. Ask them how they know that what they believe merits their belief. It starts there.