So many folks in this thread saying they have to be high to tolerate their families. What's the point of even attending a holiday family get-together if you can't stand them? (Just get high at home with a couple of friends who also can't stand their families.)
social obligations, I'd love to just stay at home and watch YouTube videos on archeology (I'm watching this one right now) https://youtu.be/30jMvj4L_jo
Since you linked to Miniminuteman, I assume you are familiar with the excellent Brad Hafford of Artifactually Speaking who dunked on corrected some of Milo's mistakes in a video, and they later collabbed. Archaeology right from the trenches! (I thought I'd mention him anyway, here's a link, too)
Jean-Paul Sartre says that human beings are imbued with radical freedom, which is the ability to do whatever you want. Society can't take away the freedoms you have within your own mind, regardless of social manners or coercion.
For example, you could approach the bad family members in private the day before Thanksgiving, and tell a lie that you're all going to have dinner at a restaurant because the oven broke. It only works once, but it sends an appropriate message.
Can't speak to others' motivations, but my wife had to "keep the peace" with her grandparents by seeing them on Christmas, even though they were awful people who took pleasure in bullying and belittling her mum. If we didn't show up on Christmas for an hour or two and put up with some snide comments and a few "I'm only joking don't be so serious", then her mum would have to put up with months of full on abuse.
We didn't need substances to cope with it, but I can totally see how people might feel like a drink or a toke with some family they do enjoy socialising with could make it easier to be with family they don't enjoy spending time with, but feel obligated to to avoid hurt feelings.
For whatever reason my mother in law didn't just cut contact and leave them to die alone in their crappy little house surrounded by their hate and resentment and friends who also couldn't stand them. Thankfully they are dead now, so we don't have to put up with them.
My mom was in this situation. Her dad was an abusive asshole, but his mom was a tyrant, and would disown my mom if she went no-contact. This was a big deal, because her grandparents owned an auto manufacturer. Like, private plane flights across the state for breakfast on weekends rich. And now, here I am...planeless. But with a shitton of respect for my mom
They may be assholes, but they know how to cook and they have hella food.
My super Christian aunt and uncle were the ones always hosting thanksgiving. But mysteriously after I came out of the closet, my family stopped getting invited.
We're all stoners this year, whole crew's stepping out before dinner.
Edit: now that I think about it, hell, I'm the guy cooking and probably on smoke break #5 or so. Basically whenever me or the dog want to go out then away we go.
I don't get how this is a thing for Americans. How are you not destroyed by anxiety and paranoia if you go get stoned before having dinner with all your relatives?
You don't need people in your life you don't feel safe around. I know that's emotionally easy for the uninvolved to say (and quite frankly my family's pretty great all things considered) but it's also true.
I use cannabis daily for several years. You get used to being in public high and it becomes less scary and panic inducing.
When I visit my family I must be fried. I can go on several week long vacations without cannabis but the moment my family is near I must be fried for my own remaining sanity.
I can speak to this (Canadian, we have Thanksgiving in October, i get high because parts of my family are hard right Conservatives): If I get stoned for dinner (after preparing dinner), I don't feel like shit when people rag on the food or bring up trash political takes. Being high makes me calmer.
Also I don't care if people know I'm high, so that helps.
If I do stay sober, I have to hear how minorities are ruining the country and be accused of poisoning people by not making a healthy meal... which makes me anxious.
Do you worry that the weed impairs your ability to produce effective counterarguments? Drag wouldn't want to go into a situation like that without being on drag's A game. Thanksgiving can be one of your few chances each year to argue with your relatives, so drag tries very hard to avoid wasting it.
I wish this worked for me. I don't get paranoid or anxious, but it just doesn't relax me at all. I basically feel no actual body effect, except my heart starts racing. Like, for hours. My eyes get like in the picture, but it's not cute, it's painful. I also get ravenously hungry. Like if it wasn't for my racing heart and bleary eyes I couldn't focus on anything else but shoving shit into my mouth. I get confused of course, which - duh - but I can't even focus on enjoying the daze because of all the suffering.
I never liked weed. I just tell my family off when their crossing lines. I don’t have the patience to hear the crazy aunt complain about Biden or another family member. Shut up and be grateful. It’s literally twice a year we have to put up with each other.